SUPPORTER: Get us some coffee
Breaking news runs on caffeine. At the $5 level, you are buying one of us a coffee — or oversized energy drink — each month. It may not be much, but we damn well need it and appreciate it. Do your small part to burn the lying media to the ground.
DRINKING BUDDY: Buy us a drink
Breaking news also runs on alcohol. At the $10 level, you are treating one of us to a glass of whiskey before we fall asleep at 4am. It helps us get our beauty sleep and we wouldn’t be able to focus on the scoops without it. Do your small part to burn the lying media to the ground.
ADVOCATE: Order the Uber
Breaking news can’t always wait for the broken, mismanaged, signal-free and Democrat-run DC metro. At this level, you are helping us keep up the pace as we rush from source to source. You can’t post stories underground, but you can aboveground. Do your part to burn the lying media to the ground.
FRIEND: Treat us to dinner
GotNews researchers need to eat too — at least once a day, even if they forget. Help us not forget, and not want to forget, as we’re scanning page 409 of the next lying media figure’s messy divorce records. At the $50, you’re helping feed us and our families. Do your part to burn the lying media to the ground.
WARRIOR: Cover the phone bill
Journalism means lots of phone calls. Night or day, rain or shine, at home or on the street, the phone is ringing and buzzing. It might drive us almost insane — almost — but we wouldn’t be here without the damn thing. At this level, you are giving us the tools to deliver you the scoops you need to see to believe. Do your part to burn the lying media to the ground.
KNIGHT: Pay for the flight
Sometimes we need to fly to Arkansas to meet Hillary Clinton’s rape victim Kathy Shelton. Or we need to fly #1 Trump supporter Malik Obama to D.C. Maybe we need to hit Silicon Valley to get the straight dope from James Damore — and fast. At the $250 level, you are helping us get around the country, and the world, to find the information that needs finding. You are really killing it at this level: do your part, a major part, to burn the lying media to the ground.
INNER CIRLCE: Uphold the website itself
Breaking news needs readers, not just researchers. When we find video evidence of James Comey perjuring himself or Harvey Weinstein telling Bill Clinton “I always learn amazing things from you”, our website hosting bill spikes along with our traffic. At the $500 level, you are guaranteeing that you won’t be the only one able to see our site, but that everyone else in the world will too. Do your yuge part to burn the lying media to the ground.
CHAMPION OF TRUTH: Fund the next historic scoop
The best scoops require hours and hours of dedicated research. $1000 lets us take a deep breath and focus on the not-so-obvious stuff that the liars and hypocrites don’t want you to realize. At this point, you’re basically a member of the GotNews inner circle. We thank you, America thanks you, and God thanks you.